And It All Started With A Bang
by cherryvvoid
Summary: Honestly she wasn't sure how she ended where she ended up or how this body became hers but if there was one thing she knew, it was that having mouths anywhere other than on her face would take some serious getting used to. Fem!Si-as-Deidara. AU. Itachi/Deidara because Itachi is my favorite.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.**

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><p>Let it be said that she was a hundred percent done.<p>

Done with her situation, done with her family, done with her life -

**Crash!**

_"Oi!"_ A peeved voice barked, cutting through the sharp clatter of glass._ "How many times do I have to tell you to stop touching things?!"_

- and done with being a fictional - turned very real - character from an anime she had read simply for the hype.

A three year old - very female, unlike what she remembered about canon - Bakuhatsu no Deidara glared angrily at her brother before grabbing hold of a vase from her line up and chucking it at his face, making sure to laugh as it exploded midair.

"_Dei-da-ra!_" The blond haired boy growled, eyes narrowing as he saw her reach for another thing to pitch at him. "You're being a _brat!_"

Face bright red in anger she reached over and threw a cup, this time not bothering to smile as it burst into pieces.

"And you're being a jerk!" She shouted stomping one delicate foot, ignoring the warning look he was shooting her as a miniature smoke explosion took place beneath her foot, grey whips curling around her toes.

"I left on a mission!"

"You left me for almost a month!" She countered, reaching out to pick up a glass basin. "A month Hiei, and you didn't even tell me!"

"It was _secret!_"

"Your _face_ is _secret!_" Deidara snapped on a growl, her fingers digging into ceramic material in her grasp as her palms tingled and heated up. "So keep your stupid secret face away from me and leav-_AH!_"

It exploded in her face.

Cringing away from the sharp sting of the exploding glass Deidara tucked her bleeding hands into her sides and squeezed her eyes shut against the tirade of tears she could feel building up in her eyes.

She was a baby when it came to pain, she would be the first to admit it. Especially considering her brother practically kept her trapped in a bubble.

Deciding it was best not to resist Hiei as he pulled her hands into his she glared something fierce into the floor, flinching every time a piece of glass was tugged gently from her flesh.

"You're lucky to still have use of your hands," He said, a reprimand thick on his grumbled voice. "But that's what happens when you start abusing our kekkai genkai."

"How about I start abusing you, un?" She mumbled, already deflating from her earlier anger."And you already know it was doing whatever it wanted, I have no control over what the Bakuton chooses to make go boom."

Hiei placed his faintly glowing hands over hers with a grimace. "Which was why I told you to stop touching things!"

Deidara immediately bristled at his tone, hackles rising.

"Well no one told you to leave mom and I alone for so long," She growled rocking forward to slam her forehead on his with a resounding clunk. "_you idiot boy!_"

Falling back as she grasped her forehead she glared at her brother as he mirrored her actions.

"_You little lunatic!_"

_"Well maybe now you'll learn your lesson and not just leave whenever!" _She shouted back. "Just wait until kaa-chan gets home, she's gonna rip into you good!"

And like giving her a mention summoned her from the deepest pits of hell the soft feminine sound of their mother drifted onto the room and both of them froze. Turning towards the door they both watched as she stepped into the room with a ladle spoon in her grasp and an apron around her waist.

"Dei-chan~ I'm making lunch now, what did you want to-" A pause and wide blue eyes blinked out of a sweet face before a smile as tooth rotting as syrup stretched its way across her lips. But the brightness of her grin do nothing to disrupt the menacing black aura suddenly surrounding her slight frame.

"_Oh?~_ Is that my little shadow I see, _yeah?~_"

Her brother instantly blanched and without a second thought attempted to throw himself head first out of the window but their mother was faster. Bakuhatsu no Kasai wasn't a member of the ANBU for no reason, the woman had worker hard to earn her speed and retiring didn't slow her down at all.

A single delicate hand was settled onto his shoulder mid jump and with wide, fear filled eyes he watched the smoke sizzle out from underneath her grip and Deidara could swear she saw a piece of his soul float away from his body.

But then again whenever someone like her mother began to employ her bloodline limit that tended to be the usual reaction.

"Dei-chan, un?~" Kasai called sweetly and even though she knew her mother's ire wasn't directed towards her it didn't stop her from her jerking back.

"Y-yes kaa-chan?" She stuttered out with a shaky grin but her mother did nothing but smile.

"Why don't you go out and play hm~," She suggested - commanded - with a cheery giggle. "Your brother and I need to **_talk._**"

Catching the pleading look Hiei was flashing her she pushed herself into a standing position and bolted for the door. No way in hell was she staying to help him out, she had been offered an out and by kami she would _take it._

"_Byeonii-chanhavefunwithyourtalkyeah!"_ She shouted in one whole breath as she slammed the door behind her. _"I'llprayforyou!_"

The terrified screams of her brother echoed behind her but she had long since learned to tune it out. Her family this time around was something else entirely but she wasn't yet sure if it was something good or bad.

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><p><strong>So this is my Deidara fic. This will be AU. I tried my hardest but oh well.<strong>

**So what do you think so far? I like Dei-chan's mom lol.**

**Please review! ^^ Excuse any errors.**


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